Need 1.  Acknowledge the reality of the death.

Use real words not euphemisms.  Honor family systems, cultural traditions and beliefs.

Need 2.  Move toward the pain of the loss while being nurtured physically, emotionally and spiritually.

To heal, the child must be encouraged to embrace the wide range of thoughts and feelings that result from death.

Need 3.  Convert the relationship from one of presence to one of memory.

Remembering makes hope possible- bereaved children's futures open to new experiences to the extent that memories have been embraced..

Need 4.  Develop a new self-identity based on a life without the person who died.

Take on new roles - everyone, children included, must redefine their role in the family system.

Need 5.  Relate the experience of death to a context of meaning.

With support and understanding, bereaved children learn a true appreciation for life and what it has to offer.

Support groups allow children to explore their many thoughts and feelings about grief in a way that helps them be compassionate to themselves.

Need 6.  A continued supportive adult presence in future years..

The long term nature of grief means that bereaved children will need adult "stabilizers" in their lives long after the event of death.